Lonely

why do you have to waiting if I want it go
Why do you have to worry if it just a memory
Why do you have to see the Blackberry if nothin' to wait
What do you expect

Nobody to share
Keep it to your self


The time like stop movin'
but decision must be made
Difficult, but should

It's so hard
But have to do....

The music spinnig around
Fillin' the room.
That girl really wanna dance, but her legs bound
she want to sing, but her mouth locked
she doesn't know what to do
the music played louder
then she move her hand slowly,,
Dancing in her stand place
Enjoying the music
Alone...

Hari pertama mundur perlahan

Bukan hal yang sulit ketika manusia mencoba menghindar dari hal yang mereka benci...
hal itu menjadi sulit ketika manusia mencoba menghindar dari hal yang kita suka.
hal yang sepertinya kita inginkan.

Bila seorang manusia buruk di mata seseorang, apakah ia akan buruk juga di mata orang lain?
Manusia seperti kertas, ketika ia menyerap hal hitam, ia akan bertitakan hitam
Ketika ia menyerap hal yang merah ia akan menjadi merah...
warna-warna dunia tidaklah kekal..ia akan berubah seiring berputarnya waktu.
Akupun begitu,, ketika seseorang mempengaruhiku kadang aku terpengaruh..

Sulit rasanya tetap pada pendirian, berperanga dengan hitam pekatnya kehidupan,
Hari ini contohnya...
hari ini adalah hari pertama saat aku harus berperang dengan ke'egois'an ku
hari ini adalah hari pertama aku harus mundur perlahan..
perlahan tapi pasti

satu pertanyaan saja, bisakah aku?
Ketika aku menjadi kertas putih dengan banyak tinta di dalamnya
banyak warna yang membuatku bingung
Banyak warna yang membuatku harus memilih.

talking to the moon, gara-gara kamu!

tau gak, gara-gara kamu aku iri, gara-gara kamu yang begitu sempurna, aku serasa kebanting bukan siapa-siapa...hahahahah...tapi kamu juga yang selalu bisa membuat aku tegar, bertahan..
I'm happy that we're born together,,,
I'm happy always have someone who always listening

this is my first time feelin' so jealous....
read this lirics...
i'm feelin' this because of you..
i dont know why.
maybe i'm jealous, or i just miss the moment when we are together

Talking to The Moon

 

I know you’re somewhere out there
Somewhere far away
I want you back
I want you back

My neighbors think I’m crazy
But they don’t understand
You’re all I have
You’re all I have

At night when the stars
Light on my room
I sit by myself

Talking to the moon, tryin’ to get to you
In hopes you’re on the other side talking to me too
Oh, am I a fool who sits alone talking to the moon

I’m feeling like I’m famous
The talk of the town
They say I’ve gone mad
Yeah, I’ve gone mad

But they don’t know what I know
‘Cause when the sun goes down
Someone’s talking back
Yeah, they’re talking back

At night when the stars
Light on my room
I sit by myself

Talking to the moon, tryin’ to get to you
In hopes you’re on the other side talking to me too
Oh, am I a fool who sits alone talking to the moon

Do you ever hear me calling?

‘Cause every night
I’m talking to the moon, still tryin’ to get to you
In hopes you’re on the other side talking to me too
Oh, am I a fool who sits alone talking to the moon

I know you’re somewhere out there
Somewhere far away

confession of an (not)angel woman

I just close my eyes....
Walkin' in a different pattern of my life before.
Just for today, just for make my self know how is the feelin'
being a devil is easier than being an angel..
but,
that just feel so wrong....

I forgot my principle for a while
I break the rule just a second,,, ok, not a second, many seconds
trying to know how is the feeling to be a bad person

feel so bad, you know...
Now i'm trying to back to my way before

Trying to be a good person and repair all of my fault
all i want is my life and my little family always happy
All i wanna do is find the way back into love..

begini toh rasanya

hahahahah............
ingin rasanya aku tertawa terbahak-bahak,,terpingkal-pingkal karena suatu hal yang konyol

lucu.lucu sekali...
lucu rasanya ketika kau pikir kau akan merasakan suatu hal yang menakjubkan.
Kau pikir kau akan merasa terbang melayang.

tapi ternyata tidak.
kau tak merasakan apa yang kau pikirkan,
hal yang kau pikir akan begitu hebat ternyata biasa saja,
biasa...sangat biasa,,bukan hal yang hebat, bukan hal yang super..

boleh aku tertawa lagi?
tertawa sampai aku puas?
salah rasanya aku melakukan hal ini, tapi ya bagaimana lagi,,memang itu yang aku rasa...

yaampun,, aku tidak habis pikir mengapa aku membayangkan hal yang sebenarnya sangat jauh dari kenyataan?
apakah ini bantuan Tuhan?
Engkaukan yang melakukan ini?

hhhh.............
lagi-lagi aku berkata..begini toh rasanya
memang awalnya bukan ini yang aku harapkan
tapi memang ini yang terbaik

begini saja,,, aku akan berhenti tertawa,
aku akan mengambil hikmah ini

aku anggap tidak ada
aku anggap kosong..
cerita yang tidak harus diceritakan
cerita yang tidak harus ada
cerita yang tidak usah orang tau
cerita tentang aku, bukan dengan mereka,,, tapi dengan sikapku,sifatku, emosiku
dan semua hanyalah tentang aku..
aku yang bisa jadi jahat... dan bukan malaikat.

Driving a car without lisence

No body's perfect... i know that me to.
i feel like drivin' a car without lisence... so scare if there a police would catch me one day

to be a bad person is  easier than to be a good person.
we never care about what people think,, just go go go.. never care is that right or wrong.
It's life...
never as we want...
why?
who is wrong here?
Am I? or just the condition??

God, please save me. i'm still wanna be a good person..
please ...

i believe the life cycle....
and I believe that everything will be so fine :)

thanks God, thanks for giving me all experience in this life,,
and thanks for giving me this strengh...

July 20, 2011

July 20, 2011

I dont even know that everything isn’t simple as I thought. I always try to do my best, but he never help me. I have to do everything  by my self. Cooking, preparing my son, praying etc.

Today was so bad. I lost my motor key, when it found, it can’t be use. Such a worst day…

I just wanna ask u God, why it feel so complicated. When I tell this story just so simple, but when I face it, I just wanna give up. So hard to me to do this alone L

I feel like I live alone, nobody care, nobody help. Why that u never  trying  to help me and sometime ask me “are you tired? Let me do that”

Simple word but will make me smile J